reality

so... sitting in a hostel is not exactly the best place to write personal blogs, but f it.
i'm not inspired to write on my public blog... where i'm an upstanding citizen, off to help children in honduras... there are times for that.
this is not that time.
not after crashing into backpacker party central.
not after a one night stand with an aussie surfer. ("check")
not after developing a semi weird crush on a swede with a girlfriend.... well, not a crush exactly... more like a pseudo relationship that lasted 5 days without any sex.
strange.
more on that later.

it's like i've had a taste of moving away from home for the first time again.... the novelty of the parties and the boys pretty much have already worn off in less than a week... where as in university it took a little while longer...
but there are similarites.

this backpacking alone thing is a roller coaster.
meeting people... then becoming fast friends... then saying goodbye.
not really bothering to keep in touch, b-c what's the point.

i miss my real friends.
i miss talking shit and telling every little detail without worry of judgement.
i miss you guys.

i think once i'm in honduras i'll at least be able to develop relationships for longer than a day or two...

it's good though.
i think i may be starting to shed some of my protective layers.