Monday, September 17, 2007

sharing

i don't like to share unless it's my idea.
i've always been like this.
when i was a child it was toys and ideas.
now it's people.
i'm happy to share friends for the most part.
sometimes it bothers me.
a friend dating another friend.
an ex friends with a close friend.
a close friend independently getting close with an old friend.

i think it's when the shared friendships happen outside of my existence.
i think maybe it makes me feel disposable.
insecure.
afraid of being left out.
afraid of being second best.

thankfully these insecurities pass fairly quickly.
ahhh... human frailty.
i hate to admit it.

3 comments:

Lindsay said...

I have recently felt the same way. It's still yet to pass for me but it comes only in waves now which is progress, I guess. I will be your friend!!! Soon, I hope.

Warrior Princesse Alathariel said...

I hate sharing friends. I want everyone to focus on me.

skinny-rabbit said...

A lot of my friends hate sharing me. I rarely mix friends because my friendships are always taken to a point where everyone gets so possessive of me I kind of like that.